Someday

chapters 1 2

Chapter 2

Bulbs flashed in my face as I fought the urge to run past the reporters to my San Francisco home. It was 2 weeks after that fateful meeting with you and we hadn’t spoken since. I had actually avoided talking to you and for good reason.

“Darren, is it true that you didn’t tell Daniel about the break up before you spoke to the Herald?”

“Darren! Can you answer a few questions for us?”

“Have you spoken to Daniel at all since the news was leaked?”

“Were you planning on telling Daniel about the article before it was published?”

“Darren, what do you have to say in response to Daniel’s comments that this was the first he’d heard of the break up?”

I gritted my teeth and muttered with a false smile, “I really don’t have anything more to say than I already have. I’ll do interviews one-on-one only, so please contact my publicist or my manager.”

I finally pushed my way past them and walked calmly through my front door, slamming it shut behind me. I could still hear their clamoring for answers. I had only one…I did what I had to do. And I beat you to the punch, since I knew your lawyers were still gathering their case. This was the only way, and my agreement with Cameron Adams and the Herald to pretend that the article had been leaked prematurely was just so my publicist and record company didn’t completely freak out at me.

My legs finally gave way to my inner turmoil and I leaned back heavily on the door. I looked towards the living room and saw Leonie just as she hung up the phone. She gave me a sympathetic look but it was also rife with warning. She wasn’t going to take my complaining today.

I gave her the up nod and smiled weakly.

She rolled her eyes and came over. Ironically this was the only place in my house that someone couldn’t photograph us, even with a zoom lens…directly behind the front door. We had learned that the hard way.

“I don’t know how they got people over here so fast, considering the news was only out a day ago,” she mused, as she made a face at all the noise. “But it doesn’t matter. I just got off the phone with Daniel’s mum. Daniel’s been trying to call you for the last 36 hours, Darren. Don’t you think you should talk to him at least?”

I hadn’t told her, of course. I hadn’t told anyone. Oh, not that they didn’t all know I swing both ways. People know that, although I’ve never had to tell them. I make it perfectly clear in my own way. But you…they don’t know about you. Although some fans have guessed, it seems. Still, they sure as hell don’t know what happened 2 weeks ago.

Leonie of course had just assumed the break up was because of what you’d said 2 years ago. The publicist had suggested I stick by that reasoning to save face, particularly in response to your claims that this was the first you’d heard of the whole thing. You were good, I gave you that.

“I don’t want to talk to him. Didn’t you explain it to him yesterday? What’s the issue, he’s the one that broke up the band 2 years ago.” I tried to act genuinely irritated and impatient, as if it were all merely a formality. Inside, I was sure my heart was slowly solidifying.

“Darren…” Leonie gave me a worried look and touched my arm gently. “Just talk to him. Maybe you can talk him out of this lawsuit.”

I shook her off and headed for the kitchen. “What’s for dinner?”

She hated it when I blatantly changed the subject. “Come on, Darren! Don’t be so stupid. Listen, I know I always said you deserve better and you do! But Daniel was your business partner for 8 years. Just talk to him!”

I sighed. And finally gave a nod, though I refused to look at her. As soon as she saw that though, my Leonie was back and she was running about getting me something to eat. We had dinner and the noise outside finally ceased. I’d had no idea the news would be so big, really. Call it naïveté, as I’m sure you would.

I had a few hours of peace as night fell, just watching television and being a normal human being. The phone rang, and although Leonie glared at me, I didn’t pick it up. When it went to the answering machine, I heard my mother’s voice querying over the electronic device, “Darren? Are you home? Pick up!”

Though I jumped up to catch it, she’d already hung up by the time I lifted the receiver. I put it down with regret, and attempted to ignore Leonie’s serves-you-right expression. The phone rang almost immediately as I put it down and I picked it up again quickly.

“Sorry mum! I’m glad you called back! I jus—“ I was cut off abruptly by your voice.

“It’s Daniel.”

I hesitated, my eyes widening. My alarm must have been apparent to Leo, because she quickly shut off the telly, and gestured for me to sit down. I did. Then I took a deep breath, tried to speak, couldn’t, took another deep breath and…hung up on you.

Yes, I admit it. I hung up on you. It took me a few seconds to register that and when I did, I leaned forward and buried my face in my hands. Leonie, I saw from the corner of my eye, had the look of a fish out of water. You would have appreciated it, I think.

The phone rang again. I tried to ignore the shrill tone as I just focused on breathing. Eventually the answering machine picked up again, and this time your velvety voice came across clearly. You spoke in a low personal tone, but it was filled with tension, “I’m assuming that the line got disconnected. Darren, pick the phone up. Please.”

I waited a millisecond then with an offhand “Stop that, Leonie, you look so unattractive,” I picked the receiver up from its cradle again.

“Sorry.” That’s all I had to say really. That would have summed up everything I had to say to you in general, only I knew it wouldn’t be enough.

“Darren…don’t apologize. We’re both doing what’s necessary.” You said this in an almost conversational way, as if we were talking about the weather. “Listen, I just want to understand what happened.”

“I did an interview with a reporter around the time I told you about my….wishes…” I stuttered here, because I didn’t want to go over what had happened between us then. “He didn’t realize I had said not to print it for a few weeks until we had sorted out the mess. I’m really sorry I hadn’t mentioned the article, I should have told you before.”

“Hmm. That’s alright. The media are hungry bastards.” You paused, your voice barely altering in its cheerfulness. “So that’s it then? No more surprises in the media or anything?”

“Daniel…you said you couldn’t handle the media and touring anymore 2 years ago. The record label wants that to be the official story. Please…don’t make this difficult…” My voice broke slightly with emotion.

Another long pause. “I wouldn’t do that to you, Darren. If that’s the story, I won’t contradict it. Is there anything else you’d like me to say?” I finally picked up some genuine emotion there. Your voice had a hint of sarcasm and bitterness. I felt like a heel.

“I…just tell the truth, Daniel. As much as you can without…you know.” You didn’t have to lie for me, to hell with the record label. Little did I know, the truth you’d tell them would mean more insinuations of your victimization in all this?

“Well thanks for that. Darren…” My body clenched every time you said my name in that regretful way. “The court hearing is next week. I didn’t want to put it off, so, if you can make it…”

I clenched my teeth, and closed my eyes in pain. “I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“Not if you want to win.” You said this so matter-of-factly, for a moment I had a blind flash of rage fill me. Don’t you even care? Why are you doing this? But it was gone in the next moment when you added, “I bought you a plane ticket. Leonie should be getting it tomorrow with the summons.”

The thoughtfulness of it almost made me forget that you were suing me. Almost, but not quite.

“Thanks.”

That was ripped out of me like an embedded machete. I think you could tell it was, because suddenly your voice sounded slightly amused. “You’re welcome.”

I made a decision then and there. I glanced at Leonie who was pretending not to listen, but I could tell she was rapt. I had to be careful what I said. “Daniel?”

“Hmm?”

“This chapter of my life…it’s over. Even if you win, I can’t do it anymore. This lawsuit will just be on principle and in the end, no good can come of it.” Why are you straining what little there is left of our friendship like this?!

“We’ll see, Darren. I don’t agree with you, but we’ll see. I’ll see you next week.” Your tone was steel now, and you said goodbye firmly before hanging up. I felt like the air had been kicked out of me.

I slowly hung up. I refused to look at Leonie as I silently walked down the hallway to the stairs. I needed a shower suddenly, to rid myself of all this pain and mental dirt. I stripped down in my bedroom and walked into the bathroom. The water felt healing, and as I stood under the streaming warmth, I couldn’t help but be surprised at how calmly I was handling this. Well really it was just a numb feeling rather than anything else.

I suppose I should have been mad at you. Or at least more visibly upset, waterworks and all that. But I wasn’t. The way you were fighting me on all of this was making me more determined even as it made me crave peace. I had the will to fight, but there was a greater urge to just give in, which was what you wanted. It’s probably what you were counting on.

But don’t think I will, Daniel. You and I, we’re finished. If I want to remain sane, that’s the only solution. I’ll say and do whatever I have to, to make this end the way it should. As I’m sure you will. But then you were always competitive.

God, I missed you.

The tears finally came.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Hearing 108/A of Jones versus Hayes is now in session, the Honourable Justice Ramsey is presiding.”

After that I stopped paying attention. A lot of formalities were exchanged, documents handed over, questions asked of both of our counsel. I couldn’t look up, because I knew my eyes would only end up on one person in the crowded courtroom. Cameras flashed at random, until the judge became annoyed and asked that the reporters and photographers cease and desist. Motions were put forth before I tuned in again.

“Motion to move this hearing to American jurisdiction denied pending joint perusal of all contractual documents involved.”

The courtroom murmured at the unorthodox request and its corresponding response.

“Motion for a closed courtroom hearing on the grounds of contract confidentiality per Sony Music Australia by-laws, granted. We’ll adjourn for a 5 minute recess to clear the courtroom.”

The gavel slammed against its wooden pedestal, and the courtroom was louder than ever as various media members complained amongst themselves. I felt the beginnings of my second headache coming on. I hadn’t been this nervous since our Olympics performance.

And the fact that you looked spectacular in your polished business suit, with your face of grim determination, didn’t help. At all. I went back to staring at my lap until the court was in session again, ignoring whispered attempts at support from my lawyers.

“Your Honour, my client wishes to speak, if that is acceptable to the court.” Everyone seemed startled, your prosecuting team, the judge, as well as my own lawyers. I glared at one of the ponces, but he just shrugged. The judge indicated to you to stand up. Your lawyer exchanged a meaningful look with you as he sat down, making me suspicious as to what you had to say.

“Your Honour…the essence of my lawsuit is that Mr. Hayes willfully backed out of our contract with Sony Music, as well as personal contracts between the both of us. While these contracts were not scripted, I feel like the foundation of trust that existed in our business arrangement was violated.”

You spoke calmly, casually even. You had no paper to read from, but you seemed to know exactly what you were saying, legal jargon and all. And for the first time that day, I was scared. Petrified really. I couldn’t speak, and I listened to you with sheer dread…knowing deep down what was coming, yet unwilling to acknowledge it.

“Normally, that in itself is not grounds for a lawsuit, I know. But the fact is that Mr. Hayes implicated me as the source of the dissolution of our band when it was not at all the case.”

When you paused, the judge raised an eyebrow and prompted you, “That is all well and good, Mr. Jones, however that would be a case of libel and slander as opposed to one of contractual implications. Or perhaps at the least, it would be one of personal distress. From what I’ve read, any written contract you’ve handed me has the allowance of no-fault dissolution. It doesn’t matter whether you or he dissolved it.”

You seemed to hesitate at this, and for a moment our gazes met. Your eyes were unreadable, but I could sense in their turmoil that you were trying to make some kind of decision. My unease grew.

Finally you spoke, your voice soft and steely, “Your Honour, I acknowledge all of this, but the grounds of dissolution is really what I came here to discuss. Our contract explicitly states that if either party wishes to quit the band, they may do so. Mr. Hayes has publicly accused me of being that party. I say here today that I have no such feeling, in fact I feel quite the opposite. I can only assume that he does not wish to end our contract, otherwise he would have made the declaration to the media that he did so.”

Judge Ramsey raised a brow at your eloquence, and even I had to admit you probably didn’t even need your team of lawyers. I was so caught up at staring at you yet again; I didn’t hear the judge acknowledge me. My idiot lawyer put a hand on my shoulder, and I started, staring at the judge quite flustered.

“Y-yes, Your Honour?”

“I would ask that you pay attention to the proceedings, Mr. Hayes. This courtroom does not partake in farces.”

Ouch. “No, of course not, Your Honour.”

“I asked you if you were aware that Mr. Jones did not wish to dissolve your contract. And remember you are both under oath.” That made me pause. My eyes flitted nervously from her to you and then to my lawyer. I felt like a rat in a trap.

“Yes, Your Honour. I was aware of that.” My voice was shaky, but I figured things couldn’t get any worse even if I did tell the truth. My lawyer had explained to me earlier that you really didn’t have a case, and all I had to do was sit through the formality of the hearing. Everyone knew it was a farce, even the judge despite her words.

“Then why exactly did you state to the media that it was Mr. Jones’ instigation? And do you wish to dissolve the band?” Judge Ramsey seemed confused. I almost suggested she join the club. I didn’t know where this was going, but it couldn’t be anywhere good.

“2 years ago, that was the case, your Honour. During the past 2 years, every action I’ve been involved in, every feeling I’ve had regarding the band, was under the understanding that it was already dissolved. Whether or not I wish to dissolve it is irrelevant now.” There. It wasn’t completely a lie, but it wasn’t the truth either. I couldn’t look at you, because I knew you would be sputtering from my sheer gall. But hey, I was desperate, remember?

Of course, you interrupted at this point, your voice tense with barely suppressed anger, “Your Honour, Mr. Hayes is either lying or remembering incorrectly. The incident to which he refers was resolved satisfactorily on both of our accounts, as far as I was aware. I would also like to submit that the real reason for his duplicity with respect to the media was due to Sony Music’s direction.”

“And why, Mr. Jones, would Sony Music tell Mr. Hayes to lie?” I nearly laughed at the sheer amount of disbelief and derision in the judge’s voice. Take that, hot shot!

“Because, Your Honour…they did not want to deal with the scandal of one of their bands publicly breaking up due to the sexual orientation of one of its members.”

I choked on any laughter that had threatened to bubble up. There was a slight pause. A shocked pause I would say, and I ignored the glares of my legal team. Of course, I hadn’t told them. I couldn’t believe it you’d actually done it…if I hadn’t been so furious, I would have laughed and congratulated you. Instead, I could have cheerfully throttled you. Or at least screamed at you that you’d made your point. Why were you doing this, Daniel??

I had to give Judge Ramsey credit…she didn’t lose her composure at all. Still, I could hear a slight discomfited thread to her words, “Mr. Jones, I hope you have a very good reason for bringing up anyone’s sexual orientation in this case. What exactly would have been this scandal?”

“The fact is, Your Honour, a few weeks ago, Mr. Hayes and I had an encounter during which I discovered that he has certain…feelings for me. He entreated me that it was due to these feelings that he felt he could no longer function in a band with me. I offered some…solutions to the situation, but he was completely unwilling to listen. All I’m asking for with this lawsuit is a chance to construct a suitable solution, in the hopes that we need not have to dissolve this band after all. Two years ago, the situation was reversed, and I was willing to listen. I’m just asking for the same consideration.”

Damn. You were good. I could tell the judge was completely swayed by your argument, particularly since she turned rather challenging eyes in my direction. “Mr. Hayes, is everything Mr. Jones claims, accurate? And if so, would you please answer my earlier question: do you wish to dissolve the band?”

My useless legal team scrambled to respond, but were waved down. Yeah, you were one hell of a player, Daniel. I mean, in the end, I should have just lied and said no, that you were the one that was lying. I could have said that you were deluded and desperate because you were angry with me about the article. I could have come up with a plausible explanation; it wouldn’t have mattered regardless. But when I looked over at you, with that fire burning in your eyes, the mixture of hurt, pleading and betrayal mixed in its flames…

“Yes…it’s accurate. And…” My voice was faint, my brain telling me that I was all kinds of idiots. But when I saw the hope that flared on your face…I can only say that my heart was weak. “No, I…I don’t wish to dissolve anything.” You broke into a beatific smile, filled with triumph and relief, and for a moment I couldn’t breathe. I was such a fool, and while I was glad you were momentarily happy, I knew that in the end I would destroy every iota of our friendship.

The judge cleared her throat, and rustled her papers, catching both of our attention. She was silent for quite a while as she alternated between writing and reading various things. She sighed heavily then looked first at you then at me. Finally she spoke, her voice firm with decision, “This is highly unusual, I’m sure both counsels are aware of that. And I’m not even sure I have the jurisdiction to decree this, but here it is. Mr. Jones, based on the information you’ve given today and as well as on the papers you filed, and Mr. Hayes, based on your verification of this information and the voicing of your personal wishes…I hereby give Mr. Jones one week to construct this so-called solution to the dilemma.”

She paused again, to let that sink in. Then her tone changed and radiated impatience.

“I don’t normally approve of wasting a court’s time when a gathering of counsel in private meetings could have sufficed, but I can see from Mr. Hayes’ general reluctance that such a meeting was probably highly unlikely. For that, Mr. Jones, you are forgiven. And due to that reluctance, Mr. Hayes, I order you to spend whatever time daily as Mr. Jones sees fit to discuss any potential solutions.”

My legal team made to protest, but this time I waved them down. There wasn’t any point. If all I had to do was suffer through your optimism for a week more, I could do that. I was pretty sure you wouldn’t try to sway me with…that you wouldn’t attempt…that you wouldn’t do what you did a few weeks ago, so it’s not like I couldn’t handle you. Really.

“Informally…” Judge Ramsey gave her court scribe a meaningful look, at which point the typist unaffectedly ceased typing. Hmm. Guess she has an informal say often, then. “I think this is quite ridiculous. You boys have become an Aussie treasure, but don’t you think it’s a bit silly for the courts to get involved in your personal situation? Work something out. But don’t destroy your friendship over something like this; a band can hardly be worth it.”

She nodded at the scribe then finished in an authoritative tone, “This hearing will reconvene in exactly one week’s time. At which point, it will conclude with a final decision and a status announcement for the media. Adjourned.”

~*~ To Be Continued…~*~